Finding motivation after the 9-5
If you've recently left the 9-5, through retirement or as part of a life-reinvention, you may have noticed that staying motivated and sticking to clear goals is more challenging than you thought. This post explores motivational styles and the importance of understanding how your are wired to help you create an environment and structure to keep you motivated and on-track.
When you leave the 9–5—whether it’s for retirement, reinvention, or to start your own thing—you gain something powerful: freedom. But here’s what often follows:
“Why can’t I seem to do anything with all this time?”
If that sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Many midlife women, empty nesters, and new entrepreneurs find themselves unexpectedly stuck when the external structure of a job disappears. What used to drive you—deadlines, meetings, accountability—vanishes. And now, you’re left to motivate yourself… and it’s not going so well.
It’s easy to feel like you’re lazy or undisciplined. But in reality, there’s a deeper reason: you’re using motivation strategies that don’t match your personal style.
Why Motivation Feels Different After the 9–5
In traditional work, your day is shaped for you:
You have a place to be at a certain time.
You have a boss or team to answer to.
You receive regular feedback and recognition.
That structure automatically creates momentum. But when you step out of that environment, you have to create that structure for yourself—and most of us have never been taught how.
That’s why understanding your motivational style is a game-changer.
What the Research Says About Motivation Styles
Motivation isn’t one-size-fits-all. In fact, psychology shows that people are driven by different inner mechanisms. Here are a few evidence-based frameworks that can help you understand your style:
Self-Determination Theory
We’re most motivated when three basic psychological needs are met:
Autonomy – feeling in control of our choices
Competence – feeling capable and effective
Relatedness – feeling connected to others
Leaving work can disrupt all three. Recognising what’s missing can help you rebuild a supportive environment that fosters motivation.
Promotion vs. Prevention Focus
Some people are naturally focused on growth, achievement, and big-picture goals (promotion focus), while others are motivated by safety, responsibility, and avoiding mistakes (prevention focus).
Understanding which focus you lean toward can help you frame your goals in ways that feel energising, rather than draining.
The Four Tendencies (Gretchen Rubin)
Gretchen Rubin’s popular framework outlines how people respond to expectations—both their own and those from others. The four types are:
Upholders – meet both inner and outer expectations
Questioners – need a good reason before committing
Obligers – meet outer expectations but struggle with inner ones
Rebels – resist all expectations, including their own
If you’re not sure where you fit, Gretchen Rubin offers a free quiz on her website to help you identify your tendency. Many people find this insight to be surprisingly accurate—and practical. It can explain why traditional productivity advice hasn’t worked for you and what might work better.
Stop Fighting Yourself—Start Working With Yourself
The reason traditional productivity tips often fall flat is that they assume everyone is motivated the same way. But you’re not lazy—you just haven’t been shown how to work with your own wiring.
Understanding your style allows you to:
Stop feeling guilty for not following through
Set up daily habits and structures that match your nature
Create lasting change without needing constant willpower
Reinvention Needs More Than Willpower
If you’re redesigning your life in midlife—whether that means starting something new, slowing down, or shifting direction—understanding how you’re motivated is essential. You don’t need more discipline. You need a better fit.
Instead of pushing harder, start by asking: What truly motivates me?
That question could change everything.